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changing self leadership – so what should I do?

Many a time, a person can pour their heart out, expecting answers-on-demand. It’s as if there’s to be an exchange of ‘something’ within a conditional environment. It’s as if an invisible equal-value-swap exists in unwritten terms.

Many of us would recognize these scenarios. A person who’s been feeling stuck yet pushing it to one side in denial. A leader who fervently disagrees with the priorities in the workplace, yet due to needing the money simply endures the conditions. Another who yearns to realize a dream yet lives to external validation and belief that the dream cannot possibly exist in reality. And the list goes on!

Unfortunately, these people rarely, if ever, voice their dilemma for fear of being vulnerable. The truth may be ridiculed, labeled, shared and even judged – which often occurs when surrounding ourselves with people who prioritize ridicule, labels and judgement.

If and when they do pluck up the courage to share, a common reaction is as if the secret is out, so I may as well demand an answer. The veil has been lifted, so in return or as some form of compensation, I need to know how to move forward – and now!

This common expectation is the norm for those living in a world of payment, a world of here’s the cash and where’s the product. Another name for it could be ‘a world of instant gratification’, a world where some form of exchange controls the outcome.

How could life be different?

Lift the veil voluntarily with no expectations other than to ‘feel the difference’. High risk – yes! What’s the alternative – being stuck, settling for second best for the rest of your life? Reveal the truth and provide yourself time to decide which reactions you respect and which you don’t. Be your own dream without any input from others and connect to its outcomes. How will it be different? It will be hugely different:

  • It will take time! No instant gratifications will exist, yet the return on investment will reap huge benefits. There will be no answer today for the question ‘what should I do?’
  • It will take you to places and spaces never ventured before! Some will be a pleasant change and some may touch nerves not so pleasantly. Afterall, when we live in the money-payment system, we pay to go to places we’ve never been before – this time, it will be all for free; now there’s a bonus! You’ll find no guidelines to answer the question ‘What should I do’, but rather you’ll most likely finding yourself doing what feels great, and probably not touch that which doesn’t. You’ll make the decisions yourself and allow yourself the time to do that which is aligned to your needs.
  • Life will gradually unfold into clarity. When you notice a strong reaction, it will be indicating a positive or negative against a previously unrecognized set of values or priorities. You’ll start honouring these and understanding what it means to walk away from that which no longer serves. You’ll find you’ll start moving slowly away from those who shun your dream or desire as your own internal confidence in that dream or desire will be strengthening day by day!
  • ‘What should I do’ will one day be replaced by ‘what should I be’?
  • ‘What should I be’ will one day be replaced by ‘what do I want to be’?
  • When you find yourself ‘being that being’, you’ll sit back and watch the doing happen automatically. ‘So what should I do’ will slowly fade into oblivion, and when it does, you’ll know you truly have connected to the way it’s meant to be!
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